Celebs EP

by Roommate



released December 11, 2001

Songs by Kent Lambert. Sequenced in Logic 3.5, recorded and mixed on a Tascam 564 Portastudio in Brooklyn, New York, 9/2000-8/2001. Originally mastered by Tucker Burnes and Mark Richelo at Top Button, Queens. Remastered by Gerard Barreto and Kent Lambert at the Ice Factory, Chicago, 9/2005. Photograph by Noah Minnick.




Roommate Chicago

Roommate began as a Kent Lambert solo project in NYC in 2000 and has been an ever-mutating Chicago band since 2004. The band's 2015 album MAKE LIKE was released in 2015 and described by [sic] magazine's Tim Clarke as "astute, economical, meticulously performed and produced, and deeply affecting, both lyrically and musically." ... more

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Track Name: Celebs
John's in a daze again / Kelly's unfazed again
Liz is engaged again / Brad's in a rage again

Ed's getting paid again / Sarah got laid again
Dave's flight's delayed again

Richard's at home disconnecting the phone
getting stoned all alone agaib\n

Ben's at the gym again / Alec's with Kim again
Robert's on trial again / Lisa's with child again

Joan's into pills again / Greg's into Bill again
Tom's had his fill again

Chloe's in bed, stoking regret
trying hard to forget again

Charles is in charge again / Janet's at large again
Russell's stonefaced again / Courtney's face changed again

Luke's in shortsleeves again / Mary's bereaved again
Matthew believes again

Woody's in love / sucking his thumb
feeling old feeling dumb again
Track Name: Hudson Crocs
Vampires suck the blood of Hudson crocodiles
Wolfmen takes their mummies out to gaze upon the Nile
Swamp things swoon to zydeco
Frankenstein will be fine - just another ounce of blow...

It came from outer space to bullshit with the Blob
Freddy's getting manicured and looking for a job
Norman Bates went out to Kiki & Herb tonight
Bigfoot climbed down into town for soft-serve at the Dairy De-Lite...

Frankenstein will be fine and so will his bride
Rosemary's baby's all grown up and writing songs with Jekyll & Hyde
Frankenstein will be fine and so will his bride
Rosemary's baby's all grown up and making bombs with Mr. Hyde

We'd better go outside.
Track Name: Hindsight is 20/20
Mark David Chapman is on 20/20.
So is Jay Leno, he's not very funny.
Mark David's locked up in Attica prison.
Jay's going to miss making fun of Bill Clinton.
Mark David tells Yoko Ono he's sorry
and statewide recounts must begin in a hurry.
Barbara Walters looks tense but not worried.

Jay doesn't seem to care if it's Bush or Gore,
he'd prefer Clinton again --
Clinton's the funny and cool guy, he says.
Barbara chuckles and shakes her head.

When Mark David shot John Lennon he was assisted by Satan.
Now he's a born-again Christian.
He thought that John had become superficial and phony,
that he'd been ruined by all of his comfort and money.
Barbara's narration fills up the gaps in the story,
and statewide recounts must begin in a hurry.
Barbara looks tense but not worried.

"John Lennon would be 40 years old if he were alive today," Barbara says,
her head cocked to the side, "imagine."

"John Lennon would be 40 years old if he were alive today," Barbara says,
her head cocked to the side, "imagine."

Credits roll, 20/20 it ends.
Track Name: RP (Forget the Metaphors)
I saw your mom
at the party after Esther Kahn
she was just sort of standing around

I met your sister Summer
well actually, I just kind of said hi
I told her she was great in the film
she said thanks and smiled
(she seemed really nice)

River Phoenix
forget the metaphors
I wonder what you would have thought of your brother Joaquin in Gladiator
I thought that he was really good
and that the movie was okay
you know, I felt the same way
about you and Little Nikita, in 1988

Your mom looked so much like you
like you both had the same eyes
I wanted to give her a hug
and ask for girlfriend advice

Michael Stipe was at the party
and so was Gus Van Sant
someone said that Summer was dating Casey Affleck
I said "at least she's not with Ben"

River Phoenix
if you were still alive
would you hang out with them--
Casey Matt Damon Gwyneth and Ben?
Would you still be with Samantha Mathis?
like Johnny Depp, with kids and wife?
Would you always be superfamous?
or maybe someday could you be a regular guy?

River Phoenix
I used to like drugs too
in fact, I kind of still do
but I couldn't afford the ones that you used
The fansite talks like you are an angel
at times even like you are Jesus
why don't you come on down and see us?
show us that you still need us fans.